Chronic pain, and our estimations about our own strengths or weaknesses...

This morning on Facebook, my friend Colleen, who has been going through a series of very serious health issues, one after the other, posted this status, and I am including a selection of the subsequent posts - most were kind thoughts about getting better soon, very nice. I am choosing the parts of the thread which I find relevant to my point here. Colleen lives a very busy life in a semi-rural neighborhood in my city. She and her husband are very much in love, she is bright and funny and very kind, They have a little menagerie of wonderful creatures they love very much in their lovely home and nice chunk of property - goats, fancy chickens, ducks, cats, doves - a place that makes them very happy. 

This post is about our ability to endure pain, and even more, our self=perceptions when we ARE handling it like a boss, but we just don't realize it. 
It's not that I think we are heroes or anything, but thinking of ourselves as weak, when in fact, we are actually stunningly strong, does no on any good. 
Acknowledging that we are strong and tough is good for us - because sometimes we are enduring so much more that we ever thought we could, and that is worth noting. 
I had a bit of an epiphany about this when I was first diagnosed with what was so much worse that the wrong call of "soft tissue Damage" in my hips, and they deteriorated to grindstones. 

I hope this might help others dealing with pain issues. Remember to celebrate your Strength, and please don't downgrade your courage to self-depracation. It is important to KNOW how strong we are and that we are capable of getting ourselves better as time rolls forward into whatever course of action is required for our healing!! 



Colleen: 
"i have not posted much on Facebook lately except to hit "like" buttons. Seems i have fractured my left wrist and now i have a calcium deposit there that is causing a boat-load of pain. i managed to weasel my way into my orthopedic surgeon Friday who gave me a cortisone injection which helped a lot initially but now its back to super painful. i don't know what to do.
Will try to get into my Rhemetologist and see what he can do. i love him. If anyone can help me, it's him. If he can't help, i'm hacking my hand off at the wrist. Low threshold of pain. Gots to do what I have to do. All this was typed with one finger and took about half an hour."

-- many kind thoughts of healing here-- 

Colleen: 
"I truly appreciate the sympathy and kind thoughts. I just really needed to complain last night. I'm kinda a big baby when it comes to pain."

Her friend Catherine:
"I don't care if you are a big baby or the toughest chick on the planet  --You do what you need to do, and know that we are out here and want to help if we can. I live close enough that I can be of some help even if I am 4 eyed and 4 wheeled! I hate pain. It makes me grouchy. ((((Colleen))))) hugs."


Martha:
"You know, Colleen - I really thought I was a HUGE pain wimp, too. Always hurting, always creaky and cranky about it, feeling like such a complainer. And then three different doctors looked at the X-rays of my crumbled hips, and reacted almost identically: "You're - still able to walk or even stand up? At *all*??" and then, flipping through my chart, "and, wait... you're only taking ibuprofen for the pain???" . 
And when the diagnosis was a clear "severe Osteoarthritis" and the conclusion was that it was advanced enough that there was really only one solution - two total hip replacements!!! - I realized that my "Pain wimp" thoughts were TOTALLY WRONG. I am a freaking studdette amazon, and I powered through life and performances when most people would have already been in a wheel chair.  (To clarify - I am in NO WAY disparaging people who need a chair - I've been on a walker for six months now, and grateful for the support it affords me! Just saying that I was upright much longer than would have been expected by someone with crumbled hips). SO - my dear lady - I would submit - please don't diminish your strength. You've been going through a series of physical challenges, any two of which would have completely immobilized most of us. 
We do what we have to do to live life in these chronic pain conditions, it's true - but, lady - you are an Amazon. Pain sucks a LOT. ANd I dearly hope you get relief and a big break from it, soon. "